The other day, while I was watching “Independence Day: Resurgence”, I started to wonder “Why the hell does everything in the movies happen always in America?”
I don’t know if we, Europeans, should consider ourselves lucky but seriously guys, you gotta do something.
It’s not possible that you always get all the plagues.
Asteroids are always pointing at some places in the States. Tsunamis and earthquakes are always hitting America first. You even faced Volcano eruptions and multiple glaciations in New York. "Cause you're hot then you're cold" Kate Perry would say.
Natural disasters aren't anyway the only ones.
Pathogenic diseases and Viruses spread easily at least once a year. Zombies and disgusting creatures seem to love the climate in America. Aliens come to visit the States quite often; I guess no one ever told them we have plenty of natural and historical places here in Europe too.
For God’s sake, even Godzilla moved from Japan to San Francisco.
The number of catastrophes occurring every year is so high that super heroes would face a hard time trying to save the situation, even though 95% of them live already in your country.
You seriously need a gigantic lucky charm.
I’ve never been in the States but I’ve been dreaming for long time to move there.
I wonder how it would be if reality was based on the movies, if all those things we see on the screen happened for real.
Suddenly, I’ve imagined myself eventually fulfilling my American dream by moving to New York and how an oversea phone conversation with my mom could be.
Me: Hi Mom!
Mom: Hi Sweetie, how are you? How is it going there?
Me: Well, not bad. I found an apartment.
Mom: Wow, It didn’t take so long. Is it so easy?
Me: Apparently. You know, with lot of people running away from this city there are plenty of flats available. Some are even for free and with still food inside.
Mom: Good, good. Did you have the chance to see anything so far?
Me: Yep. I went around and I saw some of those places I’ve always dreamed about.
Mom: Did you see the statue of Liberty?
Me: Not yet. They are rebuilding it for…what is like the 71st time I guess. I should be able to visit it in about 5 months if nothing happens.
Mom: What can happen?
Me: You know mom how it goes here. Today everything is fine and the day after tomorrow the city is flooded.
Mom: I know. Anyway, was everything how you always imagined? I mean the city. Do you like New York?
Me: Well...kinda!
Mom: What’s wrong?
Me: I don't know. Maybe I expected more.
Mom: What do you mean?
Me: I pictured it differently. There are plenty of neighborhoods full of Zombies, parks run by Apes, Alien spaceships covering the sun and few days ago another apocalypse was announced. They called it the 6th Wave!
Mom: Really? Oh my God! Are you ok? Are you scared?
Me: I was at the beginning but some of the local people here got used to the situation and that calmed down somehow. They told me not to pay attention to the news and to stay away from some parts of the city but in general it’s manageable. I told them that I’m European so for me it’s the first time.
Mom: What did they say?
Me: To get a gun as soon as I can. You know…just in case. They are cool. I’ve been hanging around with those guys lately, it makes me feel safer. They call themselves the Avengers. You should see them, Mom. One of them is huge and green and another thinks he is a God and brings a hammer all the time with him. Weirdos but very nice though.
Mom: Pay attention anyway. You don’t know them well yet.
Me: Don’t worry mum, everything is under control.
Mom: You sound upset by the way. Is everything ok?
Me: Not really. There is 1 thing that keeps on annoying me.
Mom: What’s that?
Me: I’ve been chased by the U.S. President since I arrived. He keeps on yelling me to go back to my country. I tried to explain him that I came in peace but he doesn’t want any alien in his country. Funny, considering the spaceships above his head.
Mom: He will give up eventually, you’ll see.
Me: What about there? How are you guys?
Mom: Here’s a mess too.
Me: Really? What’s up? Something serious?
Mom: No, no, nothing serious. You know, the usual. Dad complaining about work and your cousin just got upset because he didn’t get invited to the wedding.
Me: Oh, I see.
That’s how I imagined the conversation, like 2 persons talking from 2 different worlds.
One at the edge of destruction while the other one calm and boring.
To be fair, we had problems in Europe too: wars, persecutions, some alien invasion, and some natural disaster; but way less than what you experience every year.
We had enough time to rise again, get stronger and live peacefully till another catastrophe arrived.
I have no idea how you can manage rebuilding entire cities several times per year.
Anyway. we are in peace at the moment and the situation is quite calm so if you need to share the load, we are not extremely far. I'm not saying we love to face apocalypses or disasters but I guess you could use a hand.
Give yourselves a break, guys!
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